If the picture attached to this blog made you laugh, think, nod your head, or wonder if I am not a real Christian, it worked.
Disclaimer: I do not think you need to wake up and figure out ways that you can punch each day in the face; however, it is an interesting concept that can be applied.
We do this as people, it is in our DNA: We immediately paint a picture of someone without giving it much thought. I believe this is how we end up in confrontation most of the time.
First, confrontation is hard. It is sometimes confusing and never is it fun.
We do know that this is part of life, and if we have been around for any amount of time it is bound to happen soon.
I think there are some sure-fire ways to approach confrontation head-on with understanding. You may find that you can gain some friends through this process.
(1) Know who you are
Emotional intelligence is being aware of one’s emotions. Emotions are not a bad thing, they are indicators given to us by God to point us in the direction of growth.
We have to know ourselves and others before we can even begin to think about approaching conflict in a healthy way.
Imagine if you were just offended in front of a big crowd and it was nasty. Or someone badmouthed you on social media. What do you do?
Well, the first step would be to understand where you are emotionally. P
Dismissing it as not that big of a deal just sets you up for failure later when you explode.
(2) Identify the offender
Hey, if the offender is you own up to it right away and ask forgiveness. This will eliminate festering and thinking up things that never happened. To handle it quickly when you offend is to handle it right.
If the offender is someone else think before reacting and place yourself in their shoes just for a moment.
Did they just lose their job?
Death in their family?
It is so important to try and empathize before approaching confrontation. You will find that if you approach confrontation with a heart of understanding you may actually help someone in the midst of your victimization.
(3) Let Jesus fight for you
Jesus should always be your first defense.
Psalm 7:10: “My shield is with God, who saves the upright in heart.”
I have witnessed this at least a hundred times in other’s lives and my own. For most instances when confrontation is needed and you are the victim, just wait on Jesus.
Are you asking why?
Because our shield is God. I don’t know about you but I would rather God be my shield then whatever I made up in my head to hold for defense.
Remember, confrontation is necessary; however, Jesus acts on your behalf so let Him confront.
(4) Do not react quickly
Oh friend, please hear me. I have nasty scars from speaking up or reacting and not taking time to let God fight for me. It would have been wise for me to look at the situation through Scripture and mentorship.
Reacting quickly gives you way more energy and anger then you need to confront someone. Only bad things happen when this is the recipe.
Reacting quickly gives the other person more ammo and just excites them even more. This never ends well in any circumstance.
Wait at least 24 hours before confronting someone unless it is your spouse or child, in that
Those people were placed in your life to be the closest to you and they deserve more than to wait 24 hours. Make it happen even if it is to say, “I love you and I am here, is it alright with you if we talk about this tonight or two hours from now?”
(5) Confront like the red letters
Matthew 5:23-24: “So if you are offering your gift on the altar, and there you remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar.
Firstgo and be reconciled with your brother, and then come and offer your gift.”
It doesn’t get any clearer than this.
Jesus said that if there is any conflict between you and another person don’t even think about worshiping God or approaching His throne until you make it right.
Approach conflict with the mindset of getting it right so you can be at peace with your Father. The one who gave you life.
Conflict resolution goes further than ourselves. It goes so far that our relationship with God is affected when we do not handle it properly.
I am cheering for you as you think through this.
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